March 30, 2006
March 26, 2006
Stoned mirror
I look at the mirror and this is what I see.
I wonder if being in Amsterdam had any weird effect on me...
And it even rhymes!
March 16, 2006
Happy fat stoned bloke
Amesterdam's space cakes, German beer and Belgium chocolate... here I go!
I just hope not to return a fat stoned bloke...
Well at least I would be a HAPPY fat stoned bloke!
;)
I just hope not to return a fat stoned bloke...
Well at least I would be a HAPPY fat stoned bloke!
;)
March 11, 2006
My name is Sick and I went on a shopping trip
Today I realised that I have another personality.
That personality is called Ryndie or Sick, or something like that.
I think is Sick!
This new personality gained a life of itself and wrote a post on this blog.
It is funny, because this personality as a better English than mine and sounds like an American.
"Oh myyyy goood! That is totally fabulastic! Awesome!" it is what you can hear from Sick.
Sick is a sick guyirl...
And for some reason this personality loves potatoes and sees imaginary lines, but that's a story for another day.
I wonder who is the next personality that will write on MY blog?!
That personality is called Ryndie or Sick, or something like that.
I think is Sick!
This new personality gained a life of itself and wrote a post on this blog.
It is funny, because this personality as a better English than mine and sounds like an American.
"Oh myyyy goood! That is totally fabulastic! Awesome!" it is what you can hear from Sick.
Sick is a sick guyirl...
And for some reason this personality loves potatoes and sees imaginary lines, but that's a story for another day.
I wonder who is the next personality that will write on MY blog?!
Shopping Trip
I went shopping for groceries and stuff this afternoon.
Started by buying a new comic. No, I'm not a nerd. I'm cool. You losers just don't understand, even though you should realize it more than anyone. You'll never be accepted, just like the heros in the comics.... although they're heroes, while you're losers. Oh yeah, you're fat and ugly too, so no one wants to see you in super hero spandex. Wankers.
Then, I totally went over to Sainsburys for groceries. They've redesigned the store. I'd give it a 6 out of 10. Practicality rules the day, while aesthetics is still sorely lacking. Couldn't Todd Oldham start designing grocery store interiors? Anyway, I squeeled like a little girl because they increased their amounts of organic food ten fold. Seriously, my nipples got all hard and were chafing on my shirt because I was so overjoyed. You'd never know what this feels like, because you've never been touched by another human being, and even the baboons at the zoo with the blue noses and hemerhoids oozing out of their asses wouldn't touch you with a rotten banana.
While I was shopping, I saw this ginormous fat lady buying more chocolate digestives. I told her, "Jesus, lady. Don't you think you need to lay off the carbs? Shouldn't you just strain brine shrimp through your teeth like the other fat wales do? And how did you evolve enough to walk upright on land? Survival of the fittest, my ass! That Darwin was full of crap." She cried. What a cry baby. Maybe her salty tears reminded her of the Atlantic Ocean where she originally came from.
Okay, I'm off to read my comic and work on a pedicure. Toodles. I'm totes (that's short for "totally," isn't that hot?) gonna be nerdy cute while doing both. Cuter than your ugly faces every will be... bitches!!
Started by buying a new comic. No, I'm not a nerd. I'm cool. You losers just don't understand, even though you should realize it more than anyone. You'll never be accepted, just like the heros in the comics.... although they're heroes, while you're losers. Oh yeah, you're fat and ugly too, so no one wants to see you in super hero spandex. Wankers.
Then, I totally went over to Sainsburys for groceries. They've redesigned the store. I'd give it a 6 out of 10. Practicality rules the day, while aesthetics is still sorely lacking. Couldn't Todd Oldham start designing grocery store interiors? Anyway, I squeeled like a little girl because they increased their amounts of organic food ten fold. Seriously, my nipples got all hard and were chafing on my shirt because I was so overjoyed. You'd never know what this feels like, because you've never been touched by another human being, and even the baboons at the zoo with the blue noses and hemerhoids oozing out of their asses wouldn't touch you with a rotten banana.
While I was shopping, I saw this ginormous fat lady buying more chocolate digestives. I told her, "Jesus, lady. Don't you think you need to lay off the carbs? Shouldn't you just strain brine shrimp through your teeth like the other fat wales do? And how did you evolve enough to walk upright on land? Survival of the fittest, my ass! That Darwin was full of crap." She cried. What a cry baby. Maybe her salty tears reminded her of the Atlantic Ocean where she originally came from.
Okay, I'm off to read my comic and work on a pedicure. Toodles. I'm totes (that's short for "totally," isn't that hot?) gonna be nerdy cute while doing both. Cuter than your ugly faces every will be... bitches!!
March 09, 2006
And the Oscar to the clumsy bastard goes to...
I like England. They reward clumsy people!
Here is the story:
A few months ago I bought speakers for my computer in a nearby shop.
Since I am a clumsy bastard, after throwing the speaker to the floor a few times by accident, they eventually stopped working...
Today I went to the store and said: "I bought the speakers here a few months ago. They stopped working and I am not sure why. I don't know what i did..." (yeah... right! Bullshit!)
I was expecting something like: "What happened? What did you do? Oh... they felt... I see. Well, you have to pay for it, since it was your fault...".
Surprise, surprise!
"Do you have your receipt? Thank you. Here you go!"
????? "Sorry? Are you giving me new speakers?"
"Yes."
He didn't even checked the one's I returned. It could be stones in a box!!!
Apparently my clumsiness was rewarded with a new set of speakers.
I am already planning a whole new set of "accidental acts" to receive a new computer, TV, wirelless equipment, lamps, fridge, etc etc...
I wonder where I can find a flat TV screen box to fill with stones and take it there?! Hmmmm....
Here is the story:
A few months ago I bought speakers for my computer in a nearby shop.
Since I am a clumsy bastard, after throwing the speaker to the floor a few times by accident, they eventually stopped working...
Today I went to the store and said: "I bought the speakers here a few months ago. They stopped working and I am not sure why. I don't know what i did..." (yeah... right! Bullshit!)
I was expecting something like: "What happened? What did you do? Oh... they felt... I see. Well, you have to pay for it, since it was your fault...".
Surprise, surprise!
"Do you have your receipt? Thank you. Here you go!"
????? "Sorry? Are you giving me new speakers?"
"Yes."
He didn't even checked the one's I returned. It could be stones in a box!!!
Apparently my clumsiness was rewarded with a new set of speakers.
I am already planning a whole new set of "accidental acts" to receive a new computer, TV, wirelless equipment, lamps, fridge, etc etc...
I wonder where I can find a flat TV screen box to fill with stones and take it there?! Hmmmm....
March 08, 2006
Self-writing blog
I've been waiting for the blog to write by itself but apparently they don't have artificial intelligence for that...
Damn!
Ok... that means that I should write something.
SOMETHING
ps- If it's to write stupid jokes like this, maybe I shouldn't write at all! Duh...
Damn!
Ok... that means that I should write something.
SOMETHING
ps- If it's to write stupid jokes like this, maybe I shouldn't write at all! Duh...
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